One could probably write an entire book on the topic: “What type of man to avoid.” To this list you can add alcoholics, drug addicts, mama’s boys, gigolos, and irresponsible men, who will leave before you get a chance to know them. Of course, these types can be seen almost immediately: if a man does not know how to have fun without alcohol, doesn’t leave good tips in a restaurant on the first date, or asks you to “join” him for a drink at his house. But, once in a while you meet a man without all of the above symptoms; someone with seemingly good values, a good job, and who has the appearance of behaving like a true gentleman. Unfortunately, there are many women all over the world who have no idea that this particular type of man might actually become their biggest nightmare.
So, what are the signs that you should pay attention to before you get lost in the sticky web of psychological violence that could ruin your life and destroy your self-esteem?
- HE ALWAYS KNOWS WHAT’S BEST FOR YOU. Whether it’s the color of your lipstick, place of work or your religion. At first it looks like you finally got lucky and have met the right man. But, one day you find out that instead of your favorite TV shows you are watching sport games, instead of reading your favorite books, you are struggling through: “How to be a good wife”, and instead of surfing, you are singing in the church choir.
- HE IS TRYING TO CHANGE YOU. If he criticizes your appearance, way of thinking, culinary preferences etc….. You should ask yourself why is he doing this?! You don’t have to have a man in your life to stop smoking, or to start working out. A good sign that a man really likes you is when he accepts you just the way you are.
- HE HINTS OR SUGGESTS THAT BECAUSE YOU’RE A WOMAN, HE EXPECTS YOU TO DO THINGS FOR HIM. Cooking, baking, cleaning, washing, ironing… he expects that you will be at his service 24/7. The truth is every normal man knows if you love him, you will take care of him the best you can, without him forcing you into home slavery.
- HE IS TRYING TO LIMIT YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE. He may behave inappropriately, so you will never invite him to meet your friends or family. Or, he may heavily criticize your social circle. In any case, there is nothing good that can come from this.
- HE IGNORES OR MAKES FUN OF YOUR DESIRES AND PREFERENCES. This indicates that he is a totally selfish person.
- HE RIDICULES YOUR GOOD VALUES AND ACHIEVEMENTS. Beautiful? Your parent’s accomplishments. Smart? And who told you so? Have a great career? So, it’s because you have influential relatives. Etc…
- HE SAYS: “I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT”. This phrase is usually used in response to your complaints and attempts to show some independence.
- “WHO WOULD EVER NEED OR WANT YOU“. I don’t understand why, but it’s very common for women not to leave a man after he has said something like this. This should be a huge alarm for you to run like crazy! Otherwise, you’ll really believe that your destiny is in the hands of a man who does not appreciate you, and who is trying to glorify himself at your expense.
Unfortunately, we still live in a society where women are taught from childhood that men are smarter, stronger, and are the true protectors of women. Just make sure the protective wall that men build around you doesn’t turn out to be a prison cell that prohibits you from living your life to the fullest.